Managing Perception

Have you ever heard anyone say “Perception is reality?” The way you deliver a message is often as important as the actual content of the message, because the person you’re communicating with may not necessarily interpret your words in the way you intend. This holds true for your audience whether you’re speaking to a subordinate, external customer, your own boss -- anyone really. It doesn’t only apply to what you say, but also perception of you or your organization in general. The way someone feels about you is real to them, whether you’re truthfully super nice or kind of a jerk. The type of person or boss that you actually are could be totally irrelevant to their perception of you.

There are two main pieces to managing the perception others have of you. The first is awareness of how your audience may feel about you, your message or your actions, and the second is crafting or eliciting the response or reputation that you want. Knowing your audience is the greater part of this, but a little bit of common sense plays into it as well. I don’t know if I can teach you common sense (I’m always working on my own), but maybe I can help put this in perspective for you.

Your verbal and written communication doesn’t come with subtitles. Try to be aware of how your audience will receive your words - sort of a modified version of the “platinum rule” - and you’ll find it easier to anticipate reactions.

You may conduct yourself in the way you would want to be seen or articulate your thoughts in a way that makes sense to you, but that may not be what others get out of it.

Speak to an employee the way he would want to be spoken to and you’ll make a better connection. Put yourself in his shoes and think about how his personality or experiences will affect the way he sees you.

In my previous job, a somewhat formal environment, I tried to maintain a certain image among the team members reporting to me. I tried to be supportive and warm but not particularly buddy-buddy. I also wanted to come across as positive and sort of take ownership of policies and procedures communicated by our organization. So, I would choose my words very carefully when sharing these corporate visions and plans with my team. A lot of casual discussions on these topics would end up coming across as though scripted, as if they were pre-approved by our legal and HR departments. Employees would sometimes jokingly say “That was very managerial of you.” Although I didn’t want to be too stuffy about it, that was pretty much what I was going for in that environment. 

Of course, this may not be the ideal approach for each situation, but it can serve as an example of how to intentionally cultivate a certain perception among your team. One of my colleagues has built a great rapport with his staff, and combined with his confidence when discussing work matters this really reinforces the belief - well justified in his case - that he knows what he’s doing, is on top of things, and will take good care of them. He doesn’t simply go about his day treating his employees like parts in a machine, but instead tailors his style to maintain a specific image.

Managing the perceptions of others is kind of a form of reputation control, and your words and actions will color those perceptions. If you come across as lacking confidence or knowledge in your reports to clients, then that’s what they will believe about you, and they’ll begin to question your ability to deliver on their needs. The same goes for coming on too strong with new employees or in a new role. You could just be trying to get your bearings on what’s happening around you, but you may burn some bridges if the first impression your new group has is being overbearing or a micromanager. Know your audience and plan ahead for the reaction you want. You’ll find yourself connecting better with your team, and perhaps earning a little more respect too.

Have you ever found that the impression you thought you made was way off the mark? Please feel free to contribute to the discussion in the comments section! If you’ve enjoyed spending a few minutes reading “The Boss Perspective,” subscribe and share this site with your friends, Like me on Facebook, or follow me on Twitter @BossPerspective.

Thursday's Thought

"...leadership without morality is simply bureaucratic technique." - Fen English

Tuesday's lunch break link

Today I want to briefly share this excellent blog post with you on applying lessons learned at work to your personal life, from LinkedIn CEO Jeff Weiner. In it he discusses realizing that he was putting the people he cared about on the back burner, in the belief that they could handle it and would cut him some slack. Jeff's a brilliant leader who's done great things at LinkedIn, but it hit him that he wasn't even giving his family the same consideration as the people he manages:

"...I was doing what so many of us have a tendency to do: Taking the people we're closest to for granted by assuming they are the ones we don't need to make an effort with. After all, they'll understand, right? However, nothing could be further from the truth."

We put so much energy into maintaining the right attitudes and relationships at work that we frequently don’t give the same effort and respect to our friends and family. Find the line and try to walk it - you probably don’t have to get it exactly right - and you’ll find yourself much more satisfied with your work-life balance.

Please feel free to contribute to the discussion in the comments section! If you’ve enjoyed spending a few minutes reading “The Boss Perspective,” subscribe and share this site with your friends, Like me on Facebook, or follow on me Twitter @BossPerspective.

How well do you play the bad guy?

Every boss has to lay down the law sooner or later. While policies and their effects are usually reviewed prior to implementation, you won’t always know whether or not employees are going to like them or even follow them. If you know your people, you might already have a pretty good idea. Either way, sometimes you’ll find yourself in a position where you have to communicate or enforce unpopular decisions. You’ve just become the bad guy. So, how can you soften the blow?

The most important part of enforcing an unpopular decision is helping your employee to understand the reasoning behind it. Unless you’re in the sort of environment where your team immediately defaults to “How high?” when you suggest they jump, you’ll probably find employees a lot more bought in when you can explain why you’re cracking down on them. Although they may not be happy about it or even agree that it’s justified, they’ll be a lot more receptive, and a lot more likely to listen, if they’re satisfied that they understand where you’re coming from.

Frequently, management reacts to staff behavior with decisions or policy changes that employees may not expect or receive well. Some examples of this can be disciplinary action, restriction of privileges and removal of job perks. Sometimes it’s sharing a disappointing performance review score. When a member of your team isn’t performing adequately and you’ve already exhausted developmental and constructive tactics, it might be time to switch the carrot out for the stick. Is it possible to do this without just being a jerk?

It sure is. First of all, don’t get personal. After all, the employee in question may be very nice, and somehow just got it wrong this time. Focus on the undesirable actions that specifically led to the need for your policing. Be clear about what was done that shouldn’t have been, or what needed to happen but didn’t. Go over the policy that was violated or the goal that was not met so your employee understands what exactly it was that they did, or failed to do, that let you down.

Discuss the impact that your subordinate’s behavior is having on your desired results or performance. Is her constant tardiness forcing the work load to shift onto her peers, causing them undue stress and maybe some decline in quality? Maybe your business requires extraordinary attention to detail, and her struggles in this area are driving your clients bonkers when they see what she’s done to their marketing brochure.

Find out how your employee thinks she’s doing and the thought process behind her behavior. Get her re-engaged by asking what she could have done differently or better now that you’ve discussed what’s going on and and the repercussions, as well as the path toward improvement. You may still have to enforce tough consequences, but you won’t come across as such a bad guy.

When was the last time you had to be “the bad guy” to someone you supervised? How did it go? Please feel free to contribute to the discussion in the comments section! If you’ve enjoyed spending a few minutes reading “The Boss Perspective,” subscribe and share this site with your friends, Like me on Facebook, or follow me on Twitter @BossPerspective.

“Change” - It doesn’t have to be a bad word

When I wrapped up my time in the Marines and transitioned into a customer service role, I learned the hard way that my communication skills were lacking. Having gotten used to thinking of my peers and subordinates as line items on a roster, I was negatively affecting my team’s ability to do our job with the way I communicated changes in process or procedure.

While I was great at building rapport with customers, I had a tendency to be a bit abrasive or insensitive toward my own co-workers. It took a serious conversation with my mentor at the time for me to tone it down some, which involved the oft-repeated cliche that our team members were our greatest resource. I’ve since learned that this statement is absolutely true, but people are more than just resources to be allocated and it's important to recognize when they’re feeling unsure or uncomfortable.

Fast forward a few years. As my career’s progressed and I’ve been further removed from the “front line” and taken more ownership over things like quotas, or a store or department profit & loss statement, I’ve had to be careful not to lump in my employees with other resources like supplies and equipment. At the end of the day, or fiscal year if you prefer, it’s true that you do need to make changes based on business needs. That doesn’t eliminate your responsibility to be cognizant of your employees’ thoughts and feelings though, and the effects these have on your organization’s performance.

Although it may not be specified in the job description, one of the most important responsibilities that the leader in any organization has must be engaging the team. It’s all well and good for a manager to simply spell out goals and priorities, but you can’t just leave it at that. There is absolutely a human element that cannot be ignored in the long term. People are not cogs in a machine to be counted and distributed without context. It may be easy for a manager to rate or disposition or performance manage employees without knowing or caring about them personally -- but eventually what you’ll end up with is robots. You can probably imagine, robots don’t care for your organization’s vision one way or the other.

Organizational changes can be hard for employees to adapt to, and it’s important for leaders to understand that change management is a legitimate skill worth developing. It takes communicating in a constructive way, explaining the change and its desired effects to your team so they understand the part they play in the bigger picture, and executing the plan as effectively as possible to retain employee trust in their leadership. You’ll find that changes are easier to swallow when rolled out in such a manner that employees can buy into them and get behind your mission rather than numbly following orders and instructions. Try trusting your team and treating them like they own a piece of the business. After all, they have a stake in it too.

Have you ever felt blindsided or challenged by a change in the way your organization does business? Ever rolled out new strategies or directives and gotten a less-than-enthusiastic response from your staff? Please feel free to contribute to the discussion in the comments section! If you’ve enjoyed spending a few minutes reading “The Boss Perspective,” subscribe and share this link with your friends, Like me on Facebook, or follow me on Twitter @BossPerspective.

Say your piece while keeping the peace

In the normal course of managing your workplace, regardless of your industry, sooner or later you’re probably going to feel like complaining. This is perfectly normal. In fact, my Marines used to joke around that it was their moral responsibility. Even in a well-run office with happy employees, there may come a time when you just have to get something off your chest, simply must speak your mind, let people know about the latest injustice.

Here’s my advice: don’t.

Now, that’s not to say that you shouldn’t give feedback on situations where there’s room for improvement. If your process isn’t as efficient as it could be, or you feel like your manager needs to polish his communication skills, there are ways to address this and it’s important to do so, if your workplace culture welcomes constructive feedback. But there’s that one little word there, constructive, that is so often set aside.

Addressing errors, inconsistencies, or shortcomings should be done with improvement in mind. If you’re going to criticize out loud, be it a person or process or situation, then the professional thing to do is suggest an alternative. This applies almost universally, whether you don’t like the way your boss is talking to you, the way your employee interacts with a customer, or perhaps your company’s policy on certain subjects.

Let’s consider this from a selfish perspective first. Sure, it feels a little indulgent to get caught up in your frustrations and share them with others and just to vent a bit, but you risk falling into a trap that’s hard to escape. Once your colleagues, employees or manager begin to perceive you as an excessively negative person it can be very difficult to change their minds.

Like it or not, their perception will color their personal interactions with you and probably the professional as well. Complaining about your boss to your peers, or worse to your direct reports, is not going to win any of them over. It’s going to make you look like a whiner. The same goes for tearing down your employees without laying out for them a clear path toward improvement. They might learn from their mistakes, but they’ll definitely take you for a micromanaging jerk.

Now let’s look at the bigger picture. Let’s say for a moment that you have a real problem with a situation at work - maybe it personally rubs you the wrong way, maybe it’s a legitimate professional concern - and you start trashing your organization or policy in front of others. This is a deceptively easy habit to develop, and before you know it you’re the toxic influence lowering morale in general for the people around you. In addition to the damage this does to your personal reputation, you risk undermining the overall perception of your organization with both your employees and your customers. How much will associates trust your organization if its leadership doesn’t buy into the vision? Will your customers pick up on the sense of negativity hinted at in their dealings with your team?

What to do, what to do? Remember that word we used earlier, constructive. Lead by example and set the tone by focusing on solutions instead of your problems. Identify your issues without dwelling on them. Direct your energy toward figuring out what can be handled more efficiently or communicated more professionally in a positive light, and you’ll find your audience much more receptive. Problems still need to be addressed, but the manner in which you talk about them will dictate your results as much as the action plan itself.

Have you felt the influence of a perpetually negative person in your workplace? How did you deal with them? Do you wish you had done something different? Please feel free to contribute to the discussion in the comments section! If you’ve enjoyed spending a few minutes reading “The Boss Perspective,” subscribe and share this link with your friends, Like me on Facebook, or follow me on Twitter @BossPerspective.

How many hats in your closet?

Over the years I’ve experienced several different kinds of performance management, both on the giving and receiving ends. These methods varied greatly, as I’ve worked in office, retail and entertainment environments as well as having served in the Marines. Finding myself in increasingly complex situations as I grew into positions with more responsibility, I’ve sort of solidified my thoughts on performance management into two major pieces.

First, the whole point of performance management is not to punish employees. It’s to drive improved performance, and it doesn’t only apply in negative/corrective situations. Second, the methods used need to vary based on the situation (thanks, Lisa S.!) and the employee in question.

Now, sometimes punishment may be necessary, such as when an employee willfully violates policy or commits a breach of ethics. But this is frequently not the case.

Often a person will have at best a vague idea that their boss isn’t ecstatic about their behavior or performance without fully understanding why, or even consciously knowing what they’ve done wrong or how to correct it. Sometimes the employee may not feel like her behavior or performance is an issue. In these situations, what you want to do is reinforce positive behavior, and redirect adverse behavior.

A great way to gain employee buy-in here is to set clear expectations or goals, and communicate these to your report with no ambiguity or hesitation. You and your employee have to know where you want her to be before you can figure out how to focus her in that direction. Make sure she understands exactly why you’re setting these goals or policies -- what’s in it for her -- and she’ll be more interested in working toward them.

Whether one of your team members is struggling to meet standards or is looking to excel and receive recognition, as the leader, it's your role to proactively guide the employees forward, not just react to problems as they arise. When those positive results do come, it's crucial to reward the behavior that led to them.

The type of situation and employee should dictate the particular method of performance management. In the Marine Corps, where rigid discipline is critical due to the severe consequences of mission failure, and a lot of the communication is, out of necessity, only one-way, performance management typically consists of authoritarian direction from leadership and strict measures to correct unwanted behavior. I did my fair share of push-ups and got chewed out for what felt like pretty minor stuff in the long run, but I also dished out similar chastisement to my own Marines every now and then.

On the other hand, in a customer service environment where performance is mostly a product of process, managers have a lot more leeway to involve employees in figuring out how they can best get back on track with adhering to process, or improve upon existing processes. I’ve found that the same tactics can’t always be applied to different associates or departments in a retail store, or for that matter even different neighborhood stores in the same chain. There are no cookie-cutter solutions to getting better results out of your team, and you have to constantly measure performance to know if you’re getting what you want and if your tactics are working.

When your reports believe they understand what’s expected of them but know they’re falling short of the mark, consider more sophisticated plans. Ask yourself first if you, the process/project owner, have clearly explained what’s expected of the employee and how he can get there. Does he need additional training, time or resources? Perhaps you need to put your heads together and come up with an action plan that takes advantage of his strengths and establishes a process for building up his weaknesses, or as we like to call it “areas of opportunity.” Keep the lines of communication open and provide frequent honest, useful feedback. Likewise keep an open door policy, and be prepared to accept constructive feedback from your own team.

A manager should never get complacent or accept mediocrity, but must also remember that there are a lot more hats a good leader will wear in addition to disciplinarian. The carrot and the stick are only a few of the tools a people or team manager’s got to have in his or her toolbox when it comes to tweaking employee behavior and getting the best results.

What sort of performance management or “positive discipline” have you used or been through? Please feel free to contribute to the discussion in the comments section! If you’ve enjoyed spending a few minutes reading “The Boss’ Perspective,” subscribe and share this link with your friends, Like me on Facebook, or follow me on Twitter @BossPerspective.